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Many men share in the same general sexual fantasies: three women in a hot tub, three women in your bed, three women enjoying each other shamelessly on a deserted beach where you just happen to be taking a stroll, and the list goes on. But not all of them relate to girl on girl action . Of course there are the more "ordinary," but no less pleasurable of course, dreams of actually getting laid at all. The occasional blow job in front of the TV would be nice too.

Dreams are free! That’s why they are so great -- we can make up anything we like and nobody can stop us. Point in question is, if you share your fantasies with your girl, will she enjoy them so much she would like to participate in them and maybe make them a reality for you? There are a few she may like, but some she may not.

Read on to see how likely she is to fulfill your wildest dreams.


This fantasy is often hard for a woman in a relationship to swallow: "So you want to invite another woman into bed with us, do you?" she says. “So I’m not sexy enough/talented enough/thin enough for you, huh?” she may think. Even imaginary play friends can be threatening for your female companion, so you really need to make sure that there is a good deal of mutual understanding and trust (and erotic adventurism) between you before you bring it up.

It can be fun to bring an imaginary woman (or man) into bed (i.e. telling a fantasy story involving up-close-and-personal details to turn you both on ). But bringing a real person into your shared intimate zone poses some very real and dangerous problems. Even if she does agree, nut it out properly first -- it is highly likely, statistically speaking, to be followed by an ugly breakup.

Anal sex

Many men are denied anal sex by their female companions on some very legitimate grounds: It can be very painful, uncomfortable, messy, and did I mention painful? This doesn’t stop you from wanting it, obviously, so fantasy may well be your next best option. Anal sex is also much loved by many women, and it is on these grounds that she will probably be a wee bit curious; "If she can like it, then I should be able to too."

Anal sex is a fantasy she can easily fulfill -- if she chooses to. She is unlikely to be offended by you sharing a fantasy of this kind because rear entry is a well known and "common" sexual antic. It is no longer considered taboo, and therefore the only reasons she probably won’t do it are practical and/or imagined hygiene and comfort complications. Promises of plenty of lube and going slow and gentle will help (you may need to barter here, use what you can -- let her have access to your butt, perhaps a hot air balloon ride, a nice dinner at expensive restaurant or foot rubs for a week… you get the idea).

Watch her masturbate

Knowing that you would really enjoy watching her bring herself to orgasm gives her a great deal of power, and she would, of course, love to please you. But, revealing herself like that in front of you is a big step for any gal. If you want her to do this, then sharing your fantasy with her is an excellent way of "suggesting" she actually do it. A good method to start her off is to prompt her while you are actually having sex. It is easier if she is facing away from you and her clitoris needs stimulating -- take her hand and hold yours over it on her clitoris, and then she can set the pace and you follow suite.

After a while, take your hand away. She may or may not keep her hand there, but very gently insist it and be sure to show your extreme appreciation -- she won’t want to spoil your fun! This should develop into her feeling much more comfortable touching ger touching herself in front of you, and one day -- maybe -- she will give you the whole shebang. Don’t be forceful, and if she is showing signs and symptoms of being uneasy, don’t push it -- don’t even mention it again, because one day she might just decide to loosen up all by herself.

Watch her with someone else

This is an interesting one, and one she isn’t likely to understand, but neither will she feel threatened by it. It is something she can get her head around -- she is the one with someone else, not you -- and therefore she will probably be interested in exploring it further -- in your imagination, of course. This other person could be a man or a woman -- whatever takes your fancy -- and only involves complete and utter voyeurism.

This actually happening is unlikely unless you really, really, really want to do it, but even then she probably won’t ever agree. It is the sort of thing that may turn a man on rather than a woman, and for this simple fact it's probably not going to ring her bells to any significant degree. Unless you’re both into swinging or other "sharing" activities, watching your girlfriend getting screwed by someone else is highly unlikely to ever happen to you in your lifetime, unless you walk in on her by accident.

Being watched (recorded)

This could be regarded as lots of fun, but it is possible that she may be a bit wary of having all her bits and pieces on someone’s computer. She may be uncomfortable with her body and not want it peered at, masturbated over or available for future scrutiny by anyone -- including you.

But, on the other hand, everyone these days has digital cameras and mobile phones with high resolution cameras built into them. This makes filming yourselves very easy -- and very easy to delete afterward. It may turn her on to be recorded, and could bring out the show off within. If you want to try, let her take photos of you first or try only taking photos of body parts, not faces. She won’t be offended if you share this fantasy with her, but respect her wishes if she doesn’t want to -- filming without her permission is not acceptable. Consent must be given beforehand, and be decent: No matter what happens between you, don’t share the photos or video.

Naughty schoolgirl - Credit:
Dressing up can be exciting for both of you


Being someone you're not is fun and exciting, and can encourage all sorts of lewd activities from both of you. Your girl morphing from shy librarian to steaming temptress is a turn-on. It’s different, and variety is the spice of life. This fantasy is popular with men and women because nobody likes having plain cheese sandwiches every day of the week. Fantasy play, including dress-ups, spices up your sex life, no two ways about it. Plan your adventure or have supplies on hand for spontaneous occasions. Make sure the time is right, and dress up too if you can (and if she wants you to) to make it more fun.

fantasy-sharing tips

Make them sexy! She doesn’t want to hear about how you fantasize about the girl at the petrol station sucking you off while you get your gas. She doesn’t want to hear about how you masturbate and think about burying your face between the legs of the girl at the supermarket checkout. Not appropriate! Unless you have a super-liberal girl who likes that kind of thing, keep it real. And keep it in context. The point of the exercise is to share your fantasies for mutual pleasure, not just for your pleasure. If you don’t think she will think it’s as great as you do, save it for your solo performances. If you’re not sure, hint at it and see what she says.

Why she may not understand

If your girl is struggling with your fantasies, it is likely that she probably doesn’t realize:
  • Fantasies are just that -- fantasies. Often they are far better left undone, and in reality most of them are left undone.
  • Couples who share fantasies together last far longer and are far happier than couples who don’t.
  • Women who are sexually adventurous (read: not promiscuous) are deemed far sexier by EVERYONE, than those who are too insecure and "won’t go there."
  • Men who are sexually satisfied at home are far less likely to stray.


Always check that what you are doing is OK with both of you -- something that seemed OK half an hour in (i.e. leaping into bed with her and her best friend) can quickly change into a disaster. You know how women are often hard to read, and your questions after their comfort falters are met with a tight-lipped, "Yes, I’m fine!”? -- take the hint. You know when she isn’t OK, despite her protests to the contrary. She may not want to ruin your fun so help her out if you can see she isn’t enjoying herself as much as you.

welcome to fantasy island

Sharing fantasies is a beautiful way for a couple to connect. It is good for a giggle, good for a change and you both learn something new about each other. It can take a while to get used to discussing your fantasies, but practice. And let her do the talking too -- get her involved, see what her fantasies are and do swaps. Making a wish list is a great idea, with both of you listing things that you have never done that you would love to do someday. Then, tick them off as you work your way through. And remember: Couples who communicate well have more and better sex - fantasies and all.


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