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Performing Kegels & More

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Performing Kegels to strengthen PC muscles

When I’m not urinating, how do I know if I’m performing my Kegel exercises right? Do the exercises make any part of me move or do I feel anything? How do I know I’m working out my PC muscle?

Sam

Sam,

While it would be slightly amusing -- albeit quite bizarre -- if you could control any part of your body with your PC muscle, I’m afraid the answer is: No. The PC muscle can’t help you wiggle your ears, but it can definitely make your penis move. So, aside from doing your Kegel exercises while urinating, you can also strengthen your PC muscle by contracting and relaxing it when your penis is erect, which will cause the organ to move up and down. Perform your Kegels a few times every day, and you’ll reap the sexual and health benefits of a stronger PC muscle.

Donald Zimmer

no erection

I have had serious problems with getting blow jobs for a while now. It seems that every time I get one it feels amazing, but after a certain point my whole body begins to tingle and my penis becomes numb and loses its hardness. I have no idea what is wrong, and it really turns off my girlfriend because she feels like she is doing something wrong. It’s not her though, because it happens anytime a girl gives me a blow job. What’s wrong with me? Why do I tingle all over and lose hardness?

Jared

Jared,

Since you report having this problem with every woman who performs oral sex on you, we can rule out telling your girlfriend that she’s bad at doing the deed. That being said, one major issue that some men have during sex is with anxiety. If you have body image issues or are embarrassed by your penis size, you’re less likely to maintain an erection during a sexual act that centers around that part of your body.

Also, keep in mind that the majority of sexual dysfunctions are related to psychology. In other words, if you keep telling yourself that you become flaccid during oral sex, you will continue to become flaccid during oral sex. The remedy? Try switching up the routine a bit; perhaps she can start by using her hands and you can show her specific strokes you’d like her to use. Applying some lube might also increase sensation and heighten your sense of pleasure. As for the actual act of oral sex, don’t be shy in communicating with your partner how you’d like her to stimulate you. Communication is key to solving your problem.

Donald Zimmer

The truth about vagina size…

vagina size

I always hear people talk about the size of a woman’s vagina being three to five inches. I would like to know how big a woman’s vagina is when she is fully aroused?

Eric


Eric,

Just like the sizes of men’s penises vary, so do the sizes of women’s vaginas. While there isn’t any official data concerning average vagina size, it is safe to say that at a non-aroused state, the average vagina is usually around three to four inches deep. When it aroused, however, the vagina expands inward a few inches (again, the depth varies from woman to woman) to make intercourse more comfortable and pleasurable.

Donald Zimmer

quiet sex

My boyfriend never makes a sound during intercourse or oral sex. He says that he enjoys it and he always ejaculates, but it bothers me when he stays silent. What’s wrong with him?

Linda

Linda,

Some women moan, some women scream and some women silently pant until orgasm. The same goes for men. Silence doesn’t equal a lack of enjoyment or lack of stimulation on his part; he could very well just be the silent type. What is he doing during sex? Is he touching you back? Is he participating in the production? Or is he simply lying like a bump on a log while you do all the work? These are all physical cues that signify whether he’s thinking about the Super Bowl or you.

If you’d like him to be a little more vocal during intercourse, try coaxing it out of him. Continue making noise yourself and see if he reciprocates; or start talking dirty to him by asking him things he must respond to. Perhaps breaking the shyness barrier -- if that happens to be the case -- is what you need to do to get a noisier man in bed.

Donald Zimmer

too much sex

I like to have sex every day… sometimes, two or three times a day. Am I a nymphomaniac? Is there such a thing as too much sex?

Corey

Corey,

I must apologize, but I don’t have a precise number for you. Usually, a man’s body will let him know when he has had enough sex for the day -- he’ll get tired, he won’t be able to maintain an erection, etc. How many sessions does it take for these signals to rear their ugly heads? For some it’s two, for others it might be five.

As for nymphomania, unless your sexual activity is interfering with your daily life, I wouldn’t be so quick to label you as a nymphomaniac. So, if you’re not neglecting your other responsibilities, then I’d say you’re just a healthy man with an active sex drive.

If you’re still concerned about it, don’t hesitate to seek the guidance of a physician.

Donald Zimmer

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